


Detentionstuck

by Galaxa13



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Detention, Detentionstuck, Gen, Humanstuck
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-09-29
Updated: 2013-09-29
Packaged: 2017-12-27 22:41:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,223
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/984466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Galaxa13/pseuds/Galaxa13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your name is Karkat Vantas and you just landed yourself in detention. What sort of people could you possibly meet in an English classroom after school? Swapping tales, friendships begin to blossom.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Detentionstuck

**Author's Note:**

> Original reasons for detention by mond0 on tumblr (though it seems they've changed their url to eggito now). I changed some, but the original idea still belongs to them.

Your name is Karkat Vantas and you hate this festering shit pile they call a school. Hands shoved in your pockets you slump your way to classroom 413, you think it's one of the English classrooms. You're going there because you have detention. While everyone else is laughing their asses off and running off to the buses you're stuck in fucking detention. If you weren't so angry at the prospect of spending even more time in this god forsaken place you'd be rather shocked it took you this long to land yourself a detention notice. You moved to this town around a month back and you hate it more than the last shithole you lived in. Being the "new kid" means people decide to mess with you simply because you disrupt the social order and daily routine by just being there or WORSE they try to be your best friend and tour guide. You wanted to rip out your hair and scream the first week here. Yet you managed not to completely fuck up until today. Today your History teacher, Mr. Scratch, was trying to get the class to make scrapbooks as a class project and you told him how this wasn't art class, if you wanted to do arts and crafts you would have fucking signed up for one of the art electives! He tried to tell you that by documenting the things in your own lives you could better understand the lives of those in the past with his stupid, smug-ass smile. You told him he was a stupid feculent shithole if he thought this was a good way to teach. He then calmly wrote up your detention slip, never wiping that damn smirk off his face.

"413, English, Ms. Merlier" You stare at the nameplate next to the door and then you glance at the small window. You can spy a couple people already sitting in the desks. You really don't want to deal with any of these douchefucks. With an irritated sigh you turn the handle and step in. A tall, blonde-haired woman looks up from a pile of essays she was grading. You walk up to her desk and flash her your detention slip.

"Ah, yes, just take a seat wherever you like. You can do your homework or read a book." she says before returning her attention to the essays. You say nothing in response and trudge over to the far corner desk, away from the other people. You ignore the girl in the blue makeup and glasses as she stares at you. Next to her sits a girl (wearing the most eye-blindingly putrid colors you've ever seen) working on a packet. Some guy on the other side of the classroom who looks like he never changed out of his pajamas this morning or learned how to work a fucking comb is drooling on his desk as he sleeps. He lets out a snore that sounds like a fucking goose that startles the girl sitting in front of him. She gives him a disgusted look and then returns to her sewing. Ms. Merlier, meanwhile, simply says, "Feferi, would you be kind enough to wake up Gamzee and remind him that school is not the proper place for sleeping?"

"Yes, Ms. Merlier!" a girl near the front of the class chimes happily. Bouncing up she practically skips over to the slumbering oaf and prods him in the shoulder. "Gamzeeeee! Wakey-wakey! Stop being a lazy bum!" she says in a voice far too cheery for any sane person. "Gamzee" Lifts his head and blinks blearily up at her.

"Oh what? Is detention all up and over now? Damn, that was fast!'

"No, you sack of shit, it hasn't even started!" The girl who had been staring at you says with a roll of her eyes, her attention finally drawn away from you.

"Language, Vriska. You don't want ANOTHER detention, do you?" Ms. Merlier says, giving the girl a warning look.

"Whaaaaaaaat? It's not like I hurt his feelings, right Gamzee?"

"Nah, sister, no hard feelings. You were just telling me what was all going on." the boy says with a lazy smile.

"See?" the girl says, sounding rather smug with herself. 

Ms. Merlier just sighs as the door opens and two new students walk in, one of whom is in a wheelchair.

"Thanks, Aradia." the boy says as the girl holds the door open for him so he can wheel himself into the classroom.

"No problem!" the girl says with a smile. The two of them show off their detention slips to the teacher and settle down in the two desks closest to the door. Or, at least, the girl sits in a desk while the boy sits _next_ to a desk.

Crossing your arms you sink further into your chair. You were really hoping it would just be a quiet day, but there's already seven other people in this classroom and it doesn't look like it's going to be a quiet time with these fuckers. The girl who looks like a demented rainbow threw up on her is cackling madly to herself. Blue Bitch looks over at her desk and she starts laughing too. You sit up and put you head on your desk, wrapping your arms around your head as you try to block out the insane laughter. The teacher shooshes them and they stifle their giggles as best they can, but you can still hear them.

By the time they finally get a hold of themselves you hear the door open again. You don't raise your head and just thank god that the snickering has stopped. Your reprieve is short lived, however, as you feel someone walk by and sit in the desk next to you. You're not sure whether to tell this person to fuck off and find a different seat or ignore them. To save yourself from another possible detention you decide on the latter, but that option becomes increasingly difficult as you feel eyes upon you. Hairs rising on the back of your neck you tense up. Just for once, can't anything go your way? Just once would people leave you be?

It gets to the point where you can no longer ignore the creepy sensation of being watched. You lift you head and glare menacingly to your right. A girl with big green eyes is leaning over so close that you almost fall over in shock. She quickly sits up straight and smiles at you. 

"Hi!"

You continue to glare at her.

"Heehee, you know, your face kinda looks like Grumpy Cat! Do you know Grumpy Cat? He's really cute, but then again all kitties are cute. Anyway, have you seen some of his memes? I have one of them on my phone, it always makes me laugh. Here, I'll show you!"

"I don't give FUCK about some stupid internet cat, just leave me alone." you growl before she can pull out her phone and shove it in your face. She screws up her face in the angriest pout you have ever seen. Her anger is juxtaposed with the annoyingly cute expression of her cat hat. 

"Hey, I was just trying to cheer you up! You looked so alone over here I thought I would give you some company and maybe make you laugh!"

Oh god, she's one of THOSE people. You rub your face and say, "Look, I don't need your sympathy, I just want a little alone and quiet, is that too much to ask?"

"Fine, Mr. Grumpy Cat." she says as she rolls her eyes. Then she digs some paper out of her bag and starts doodling.

Just when you are about to hide you face in your desk once more the door opens yet again and you can't help but watch as the most pompous tool you've ever seen strolls in. Nose in the air, he walks through the classroom like he owns the place. The perky girl from earlier looks up and says, "Eridan! About time you showed up! If you skipped detention I would grill you so hard later!"

Stopping in front of her desk he looks down at her like she said the most offensive thing he had ever heard. "Oh, so you just assume I got detention, Fef? Right off the bat you lump me in with these common ruffians?"

"I'M in detention, aren't I? Are you saying I'm a common ruffian, Eridan?" 

"W-what?! No! That's not what I meant at all! I'm just sayin-"

"Oh quit your yapping, Ampora, and sit down already." Blue Chick snaps. Still quite flustered he glares at her and then sits down next to Feferi. Even from your spot you can hear him muttering, "Fuckin pain in the ass." to himself, which awards him a glare from Ms. Merlier.

At last the bell rings and you groan to yourself. Detention has only JUST started and already you hate all of these assholes. You're going to have a fucking migraine by the time this is over. Oh, and just when you think it can't get any worse the door opens in a rush and some sweaty dude dashes in.

"Please excuse my tardiness, I didn't mean to be late, I simply got distracted in metal shop." he says as he walks over to Ms. Merlier's desk to show his detention slip.

"It's quite alright, the bell only just rang. Just take a seat and work on any homework you may have." she replies. He bows his head and sweet lactating christ he's coming this way. You want to smash your desk with your face as he takes the desk in front of Cat Girl.

"Hey, Equius!" she says as he sits down, "Did you break something again?"

Turning around he gives her a stern look, before saying, "No, and I would appreciate it if you did not assume such things. I have better self control than that!"

"Then why ARE you here? You aren't the kind of guy to break the rules." she says, tilting her head to one side curiously. This obviously makes him uncomfortable as he doesn't look her in the eyes and you can tell he has started sweating more. Gross. She smacks him on the shoulder with a stern face and says, "Equius, I swear to god if you don't tell me what you did I'm gonna tell Aradia." 

"No!" he says quickly. "I absolutely forbid it!"

"Then tell me!"

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, JUST TELL HER!"

Suddenly everyone is dead silent and staring at you. You hate your life.

"Excuse me, but detention is supposed to be quiet work time and if you have nothing to work on then a quiet activity." Ms. Merlier says, looking right at you. "That goes for everyone. No more conversations." With that she surveys the classroom and then goes back to her grading. That doesn't seem to deter Cat Girl, though, as she begins poking Sweaty Dude in the back.

"Equiuuuuus! You gotta tell me!" she whispers.

"Nepeta, stop it. You heard Mr. Merlier, we are supposed to be quietly working." he hisses back.

"Aradia's right over there, though! I can get up and tell her at any time that you-"

"Quiet! I will tell you only if you promise not to laugh."

"I purrmise!"

". . . I frightened some of my classmates and I was given detention for harassment."

The girl gasps and says, "Equius! I keep telling you to be nicer to people! What did you do this time?"

"I was simply trying to inform my gym classmates how to achieve the muscular perfection I have."

"Oh, Equius, you big dummy! They probably thought you were going to crush their heads, or something! You were ordering them around and flexing your gross, smelly muscles, weren't you?"

Before you can imagine any way in which to kill yourself to escape the utter torment of listening to these two idiots a woman even taller than Ms. Merlier opens the door and peeks in.

"Penelope, do you have a moment? I need your help down at the mailboxes in the office. You seem to be the only person who actually understands the system." she says. Ms. Merlier seems to perk up at this, but then she gives the classroom and glance and says, "I would, but I'm watching over detention today." The other teacher surveys the classroom herself and her eyes fall on the technicolor nightmare.

"Terezi?"

"Yes, Mrs. King?"

"You're the aid for Ms. Snow's classroom, aren't you? Can I trust you with looking after this group while I borrow Ms. Merlier?"

"Of course you can! Hehehehe."

Ms. Merlier looks unsure, but with a smile and a nod from Mrs. King she's out of her chair and the two exit the classroom. There is a brief moment of silence in the room with their absence. Suddenly the assault on your retinas known as Terezi rises from her seat and marches to stand directly in front of Ms. Merlier's now unoccupied desk. Chin up, chest out, she reminds you of a drill sergeant as she surveys the class, a wicked smile pulling her lips back to reveal rainbow bands on her braces. You suddenly feel like your were thrown into a nightmare realm.


End file.
